Some sadness today, as it's the one year anniversary since Subi's big sister Blossom went to Rainbow Bridge.
Blossom started out as my parents' dog. She was born to a litter of a dog belonging to a friend of my mother's. Mom wanted a dog just like Blossom's mother -- instead she got something far different. Where Peaches was docile and mannerly, Blossom was hyper and athletic. For most of her fourteen years she only had one setting...fast. I was in college when my parents brought her home, so I actually missed her puppy year and have only a few precious puppy pictures to treasure.Through college, I kept complaining that I missed having a dog and told my parents that I wanted a basset hound when I graduated. I thought that would be an excellent graduation present. Since I had to move back home after school, I got instead what amounted to a "Basset Hound IOU". Also, I got the dream dog I never knew I always wanted.
I loved Blossom right away and even though she was thoroughly bonded with my parents, I decided that a takeover was in order. Having had a terrible and often tragic history with pets, I swore to be the best pet parent I could possibly be. Blossom got her vet check up twice a year and went to the doc at the first sign that something was amiss. To my mother's chagrin, she slept on the bed with me - her back to mine. We went for R-I-D-E-S every chance we got. She saw me through every little sadness, and I saw her through swallowing a Beanie Baby, Vestibular Disease, and the pyometriosis that nearly killed her. It was my duty, but it was also an honor.
When she turned fourteen I knew the inevitable was approaching. In the previous years she had begun to slow down due to spinal arthritis. So, while treasuring every day with her, I also prepared to do what had to be done when the time came. Sadly that time came a year ago today. I'm proud to say I didn't shirk my duty and I didn't run like a coward. I held her in my arms while she slipped from this world. I miss her every day. Every time I almost called Subi "BoobooHead".
Some ask how I could I be so willing to do it again -- to love and so inevitably lose. I tell them I can't imagine not wanting to. Sure, the ache in my chest was like a black hole and the tightness in my throat was like a vice, but the tears were cleansing and righteous and well-earned. When all was said and done I had given her as a good life as I was capable.
In return, she taught me how to give my love without reserve and without concern for what the future may bring. Blossom awakened something inside of me, a deep part of my soul that had slumbered in all the years before loving her. That part of me knows that I still have so much love to give.
For now, Subi is the sole beneficiary of that love, but I hope someday a golden in need may come into our life at just the right time. And when that happens, I will be ready and willing and full of love to share.
And that is Blossom's gift to me.
